I pruned my friends list.

If you got pruned, try not to feel bad. It doesn’t mean I don’t like you. I like most people (at least, at first.) Some of the reasons for the pruning:

1 – I answered a question today (“What’s your agenda here?”) and it made me realize that I no longer have the same agenda as when I first came to EP.

At that time, I was hurt, angry, and felt like I was going crazy. I wanted to know if I was still attractive. I wanted to know if I could say some of the things I really think – would people run screaming, or laugh at me, or shame me?

And I found out that some people still think I’m attractive, and that some people aren’t put off by my dark, crazy side.

And as a result, I feel a lot better, and my behavior has changed. The dark, crazy side, having been comforted, is now more willing to let my civilized side take charge more often.

(Don’t worry – Dark & Crazy is still there! I’m like an Edwardian aristocrat’s mistress – discreet in public, and, um, interesting in private. I would have been good at being an Edwardian aristocrat’s mistress. Or for that matter, a female Edwardian aristocrat. They got up to a lot of mischief themselves. It was more like discreet serial monogamy than outright sluttery. I think I could do that.)

Oh, and my agenda? I didn’t know I had to have one. I’m just going to see how it goes.

2 – The question of who really is a friend. You might not be a close friend if…

….I haven’t heard from you in a long time.

….We just don’t really click.

….You only wanted pervy stuff from me. Yes, I do pervy, but (usually) with only one person at a time. And I have so much more to offer, in addition to pervy. If we can’t connect and have a good conversation about something other than sex – I probably like you, but we’re not really friends.

3 – If you can’t spell, punctuate, capitalize, use grammar correctly, and at least write somewhat well – call me picky, call me a snob, but I hate that.

Especially from people in my own age group, who would have learned that stuff before the internet came along. If you’re 20 years old, you have an excuse for writing “OMG!!! u r SO hott!!” (Although it still makes me cringe.) If you’re in your 40s or older…no. Just no.

In my own defense, I work in an occupation where writing well and using conventional correct English matters. It’s about the only thing I’m really good at (that I’m willing to take payment for), so cut my some slack for being picky about people’s writing.

OK? Is everything copacetic?

Posted by SmartKat at 10:22 on April 25th, 2013 at 10:22AM


Posted on 06:42AM on Apr 29th, 2013
Yes This indeed is in order,…… and I enjoy reading your posts especially the 10
word stories cheers a


Posted on 10:48AM on Apr 30th, 2013
Very well said. I like the explanation of your evolution here. Makes perfect sense. I’m glad I’m still around, but would perfectly understand if I didn’t make the cut some day.


Posted on 12:25PM on Apr 30th, 2013
Harvey, you’re one of the smartest people here. You’re too cool to get cut! 🙂


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Born, went to school, went to work, will die someday. Fluent in English, sarcasm, and profanity. Open-minded skeptic, INTP in the Myers-Briggs, 5-Investigator (or Observer) in the Enneagram, Sagittarius in astrology, Pitta/Kapha in the Ayurvedic system. Likes: Music, books, reading, paid time off from work. Dislikes: Authoritarians, micromanagement, illogic, and asparagus.

One thought on “Evolution”

  1. Copacetic…a word I haven’t heard in a while, nice to hear it again. While I may not always be grammatically correct, I can appreciate wanting to communicate that way. A good interesting dialog seldom uses one or two letter words. 🙂


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